Grandparent Etiquette

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“Kids today just don’t have the same manners that we had when we were growing up!” Does this sound familiar? Good manners are timeless and proper etiquette goes a long way. You may think that today’s generation may be lacking a few good qualities in the manner department – but have you thought about where they learn their manners? Cindy Post Senning, director of the Emily Post Institute and granddaughter of the famed etiquette guru Emily Post sits with Suzanne and discusses how you can help improve you and your grandchildren’s manners.

It is Important

Children need good manners – it gives them confidence. Cindy Post Senning says manners “sets them up so they aren’t making fools of themselves – which kids hate.” Having good manners are a differentiator, and “a child with good manners is more likely to do better, and get along with, his peers and family.” Building self-confidence is an integral part of childhood development so make sure you’re teaching your children the importance of proper etiquette. But how exactly do you do that…

The Magic Words

Please and Thank-you have been, and will continue to be, the magic words we expect to hear time in and time out from our children - but they won’t say it if they don’t hear it. YOU need to make it a habit first before you expect your grandchildren to make it a habit. Children learn and (more often than not) mimic their elders. So if you are portraying proper etiquette then your grandchild will as well. You should also talk with them about manners, make sure they know what is proper and what is just plain ignorant. Here are a few examples of things you and your grandchild should go over:

Greeting – Always remember to STAND UP when people come into a room, and if you’ve never been introduced – shake their hand and make eye contact. Cindy says, “Some kids don’t like looking into eyes, so tell them to look at their nose – and always SMILE!”

Table Manners – Emily Post always said, “table manners were to make what was an inherently gross activity not so gross…it’s just not pleasant to look at.” So chew with your mouth closed and be courteous when passing foods and condiments – and always ask to be excused from the table.

Don’t interrupt – Children may interrupt you during inopportune times, the best way to handle this is to just flat out tell them not to do it. Then you should discuss at a later time with your child that interruptions are OK if –and only if- there is an emergency.
Mindful Manners

Remember manners are really social skills. “You wouldn’t send your kids out to a soccer match if they didn’t know the skills…well you don’t want to send your kids out into a social world without those skills they need to maneuver in the world and do well in it,” says Cindy. Good advice from the advice giver. If you’d like more information about etiquette and proper manners, check out some of these websites below.